You are not an easy baby by any means, and as I type this, I have actually been in your room tonight to sooth your screaming self, not once but twice! But you are our baby, our rainbow after a terrifying storm. This is your birth story!
I got pregnant immediately after my tubal/ectopic pregnancy/rupture/emergency surgery/life-threatening blood loss. Like immediately meaning my very next ovulation. My pregnancy was faced with first and early second trimester bleeding, monitoring a low lying placenta to ensure that it didn't turn into placenta previa, low blood sugar (I had had 2 blood transfusions in July and that may have attributed to it) and so constantly needing to eat or I felt like I was going to throw up or pass out (I gained more with this baby than I care to admit), kidney stones, chronic dizziness that eventually led to a terrifying fall and 4 hour hospital stay and L&D, the baby was breech since 14 weeks and that led to terrible heartburn (he actually turned into position at 37 weeks but more about that later), and eventually just overall feeling like my body was giving up on me and didn't have the strength to carry on with life. It was hard. I mean REALLY hard!
So you can imagine my great relief when visiting an O.B. to find a doctor that would allow me to deliver vbac (Janni was an emergency csection (here)) down in Phoenix, I was told I would more than likely need another csection. I admit that, at first, I was eager to try a vbac, but after the 2 hour drive home back to Northern Arizona, I felt relief and peace at the idea of just scheduling another csection in our city.
I spoke to Zack about it and at first, he was really against the idea. Eventually, after some thoughts and considering my reasoning (mainly 2 things: 1. I wouldn't have to travel down to Phoenix and possibly be in hard labor and 2. we wouldn't have to drive down to Phoenix, in labor, and possibly need a csection and then have to travel 2 hours home just days after having major abdominal surgery). We scheduled my csection when it was time.
April 21, 2016 at 6:30 a.m. was when we were to arrive at the hospital. Luckily, at that time of year it was already light by sometime in the 5 o'clock hour and we were both so excited to finally meet our son that it wasn't even hard getting up at 4:45 to shower and get ready for newborn baby pictures!
I got up first, showered, did my makeup and hair, made sure (for the hundredth time) that I had everything I would possibly need, and tidied up the house. I sure had more energy than I had had then entire last week together! Zack got ready along side me.
I sat down on the floor to put my tennis shoes on (I'd fallen while wearing sandals and although I knew for certain that I was dizzy when I fell, I couldn't rule out that the sandals didn't attribute to the fall and that's why I wore tennis shoes 9 months pregnant) and I felt like I peed my pants. I laughed and went to the bathroom to change my under garments when I gasped! I was certain I hadn't peed my pants! My water had broke! Ahhhh! I yelled to Zack to come see and we laughed! This baby was coming today all along!!
We waited for my Aunt, my Mom's closest sister who lives 15 minutes away from me, to come and watch Janni. My Mom was, unfortunately, very ill that week and for the health of my baby, would not be able to come up from Phoenix and help me with this baby until she was well. But my Aunt came and took care of Janni while we were at the hospital and it was very comforting to know she was in good hands while Zack and I were away.
She arrived, we laughed that my water broke, we all prayed over the surgery, recovery, and both baby and my health, and off we went.
I shot a group text to all my sister-in-laws that my water broke while getting ready to go to the hospital and everybody thought it was hilarious!
When we arrived at the hospital, hard contractions hit. We were still in the parking lot when I had to stop and work through one. We made it to the L&D sign-in and took care of some final paperwork. We were led to the room where I would be staying and began to get ready.
I informed the nurse that my water broke. My O.B. came strolling in to say hello and the nurse informed her I thought my water broke (to which I thought to myself that I KNEW my water broke) and my O.B.'s face said she didn't believe it. I felt a tad bit offended being non-verbally being called a exaggerator/liar, but shrugged it off! We were about to meet our baby and she would soon find out that my water had indeed broke!
I was sat on a hospital bed so my blood could be taken/ivies were put in, baby was monitored, and I could answered some final questions... but in between questions, hard contractions started. I knew what they were but asked the nurses if they were reading on the monitors and they all said, "YES!" I couldn't talk through the contractions and they were so painful and oddly in my bladder (yes, bladder contractions... like somebody was stabbing my with a knife all over my bladder, it was terrible!). When the nurses left, I told Zack that if this baby wasn't going to be a csection, I'd be asking for an epidural because this pain was something awful (with Janni, the labor was slow coming and I didn't feel I needed an epidural until the very end)!
They came and got me around 8:30 and rolled me to the operating room. Zack was asked to sit in a waiting area while they gave me the spinal and given his scrubs to wear. The anestesiologist was comforting and gentle when giving me the spinal and another nurse held my hand and comforted me to help me not jump and possibly paralyze myself (scary stuff, huh?). They hung the drape and helped me lie down.
Zack came in and the epidural went to work. It took 10 minutes to numb me, which really scared me because with Janni, I was numb immediately. I found out later that planned and emergency csections spinals are night and day different numbing systems. Once I was completely numb, I began having a hard time catching my breath. The anestesiologist assured me that I was at 100% with my oxygen and that my lungs muscles were just relaxed but the entire time, I literally felt like I could not get enough air. My O.B. came in with a full-on chamber-style shield mask (I had to google it to be able to explain it), something the the O.B. who did my first csection didn't wear. I felt a little panicked because it felt like a scene from a murder mystery where the doctor's goal is to steal the patient's organs. It really freaked me out. But she was encouraging and I was comforted by her before surgery. She opened me up and immediately shouted and laughed, "HE'S BREECH!" None of us were expecting this because just 3 weeks ago he'd turned into position (I was so grateful that I chosen a csection because he would have been one regardless because he was coming that day on his own and I wouldn't have been brave enough to try a vbac with a breeched baby!). Zack stood by me the whole time, encouraging me. Once she delivered him, Tru cried immediately and Zack and I looked at each other and got teary-eyed! Zack, who refused to cut Janni's umbilical cord because it freaked him out, wasn't really given a choice for Tru. They handed him the scissors and said, "cut here," and Zack cut it. But yeah, it totally grossed him out and he didn't find the experience something that helped him feel closer to Tru than Janni.
Tru was crying and was placed on my chest as they sewed me up and he calmed down immediately, something that it termed a "gentle csection" that is supposed to help with bonding issues that are common with csection babies that are taken away from the mom for various reasons and it was glorious (I was in full agreeance that if he came out with an issue, then saving his life was more important than me bonding and they were given permission to do whatever was needed to make him the safest and healthiest possible). I overheard the nurse and anestethioligist talking about how beautiful it was to see a baby on its mother's chest, while she was getting sewed up from a csection.
The O.B. came to the front of the drape and told me I was sewed up and that she had to clean up a lot of scar tissue from my first. She gave me a squeeze on my shoulder and I was rolled away to my recovery room, holding my baby and just experiecing such a feeling of bliss.
God is so Good!
He did have high bilirubin numbers and needed to be monitored until they came down. He also had an umbilical hernia that, even 6 months later, we're still dealing with (he's nowhere near crawling because he hates being in his tummy due to the hernia), but all really minor things. He wasn't a dream baby, he was super colicky and demanded to sleep on my chest for the first month, but he's our baby and we're just so beyond blessed to have our little man that we'll take him fussy or not!!
We love you, Tru! You are out precious Rainbow!
"After a hurricane comes a rainbow!"- Katy Perry, Firework
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